The repentant repents

by Anonymous

I’ve decided to wear a mask....
I’ve seen the light and it’s obvious I was wrong. Masks prevent viruses but also are very safe. I’ve decided to wear my mask at all times. I wear it in the shop, in my car, on the beach and I’ll even wear it at home. I’ve started wearing condoms at all times as well because protection at all times is very important. If I’ve learned anything it’s that our government loves us, never ever lies to us and always has our best interests in mind. History shows the government should always without question be trusted. They are great. I’m also going to get caught up to date on my vaccines because why would anyone want to make us sick? It’s time to trust all science just like we should trust the government. I started drinking fluoride again because the government recommends it and I got this amazing fluoridated toothpaste as well to help make my teeth strong. I’ve started consuming genetically modified foods because they are definitely the same as organic foods. Alcohol is part of living our best life so I’m now drinking daily as well; that's why liquor stores were alllowed to be open because they are essential.. Most importantly I watch television and get all my information from the mainstream media. They are wonderful at getting us factual information and I love how they work directly with the government to bring us truth and tell us how to live our lives. I want to be just like everyone else which is another reason to mask up. I love standing on all the little signs in the stores that alert me to where I should be so I social distance properly in an effort to keep everyone else safe. It’s also quite fun to follow all the arrows in these stores that direct you where to go. It’s like, “whoa where are you taking me next.” It’s an exhilarating ride. I’m also sorry to everyone, I’ve posted a lot of things that have been debunked by fact checkers and snopes, so I’m very sorry I was wrong and I’m glad these reputable sources of factual information were able to correct me. It’s good knowing facebook wants us all to have the most up to date and accurate information. Anyway, who’s ready for this fast tracked covid vaccine? I think the most exciting part is getting an untested vaccine that contains aborted fetal dna, it’s like we are pioneers of the scientific future and we are doing our part for humanity to volunteer as tributes for this vaccine. Not to mention we can probably get the microchip at the same time so the government can keep us safe by monitoring us even more. Plus with the cashless society coming we will need to be good, follow orders so we get paid via our chip so I really want to make an effort to be the best citizen I can. It’s all about the new normal we all will help to create. It’s amazing how quickly everyone has conformed and it makes you realize how much everyone must really care about each other. I mean why else would people who are morbidly obese, grabbing fast food and stopping at the liquor store, also be in a mask? Obviously everyone cares deeply about health and staying healthy. Stop being selfish and just do as you’re told, are we not all in this together? I mean how great is the new world order for uniting us all and bringing us closer together? Gives me goosebumps to feel so loved by those in control.